Just Keep Swimming

I took the kids to see Finding Nemo yesterday. Yes, we own it on DVD, and we've seen it many times. But of course we had to go see it in the theater, because now it's in 3D. I didn't really mind, though, because it's a cute movie, and seeing it on the big screen was kind of cool.

While the whole movie is fun, and all of the characters have their merits, Dory has always been my favorite. Sure, she has issues. But she is incredibly sweet, and caring, and always means well. And I love her attitude. She never lets her problems get her down, and her glass is always half full.

I've always kind of related to Dory in a way. I don't exactly suffer from short-term memory loss like she does, but thanks to the issues associated with the CRPS, coupled with the years of pain medications, I do have trouble with my short-term memory sometimes. So every time I suddenly forget what I was doing, I think of her.

And sometimes, I like to sing her song.

I've been a bit of a "Mr. Grumpy Gills" the last few days. I've been trying to fight it, but even those of us who do our best to always look on the bright side can have our cloudy moments too. Unfortunately it comes with the territory of living with a chronic illness. 

We all have our ups and downs - I know I'm not alone in that. Sometimes it's easy to believe that we can get through it, and that things will get better... and then there are times when just getting drunk and having a big bowl of ice cream for dinner sounds like a really brilliant idea. (Not that I've ever actually done that. But I can't lie - there have been moments lately when it did briefly cross my mind.)

But the "downs" do eventually pass, and the "ups" come back. So we can never let ourselves forget that all we have to do is just keep swimming.

When it All Fits Together

Do you ever have those times in your life when everything just seems to be fitting together perfectly, and all signs keep pointing you in the same direction? I love those times!

Over the weekend, just days after I talked to my doctor about my new approach to pain management, that very office happened to be holding a Chronic Pain Awareness Expo. It promised to "highlight a variety of chronic pain topics & community resources" and "provide attendees with helpful information to successfully manage their pain." Just the kind of things I was looking for!

So I managed to line up some last-minute babysitting (thanks again Mom!) and headed over to check it out. Events like this can be kind of hit or miss, so I wasn't sure if it would be worthwhile or not. But luckily, this was one of those times when it actually was.

The one disappointing thing was that I showed up about three hours before the event was scheduled to end, and more than half of the vendors had already left. Even with that, the ones that had stuck around had some great information to offer. I met some great people, got a few product samples, and left with several new things to research and think about.

Feeling bad that so many of the vendors had left early, one of the organizers mentioned that the clinic is having another expo at their main location at the end of the month, and she said it promises to be even bigger and better. It's quite a few miles farther to drive, but I think it might be worth it.

I'll share more about some of the things I got from this weekend's fair as I have more time to finish reading and doing the research. (I think there's some pretty interesting stuff to be learned, so stay tuned!) Also, if you happen to be in the Scottsdale (AZ) area on the 29th, consider checking out the expo! Or, if you're not in the area, I encourage you to do some checking and see if there are any events like this in your area. You never know what great stuff you could find!

Resisting the Urge to Be Snarky

I wrote the other day about how important it is, when you have a chronic illness, to find people who understand what you're going through. Because, unfortunately, there are a lot of people who completely don't understand. And as I've mentioned, some of those people who don't understand can get pretty nasty about it.

Having a chronic illness is enough of a roller coaster ride in itself. Adding all of the extra emotional turmoil just gives you that much more to deal with. And I'm not going to lie - it gets tough sometimes. We all go through the different stages of how to deal with the more difficult people and situations that we encounter. And like it or not, sometimes we can't help but be a little snarky and sarcastic.

I came across a couple of pictures going around on Facebook this week. And I'm going to share them, because they made me laugh, but I have to share them with a caveat. The first thing is that people in constant pain have to be able to laugh, and sometimes the irony of what we deal with is as good of an excuse as any. So when you see things like this, appreciate them for what they are, and laugh.

But at the same time, remember that the sarcasm serves a purpose, but should not be used as a guide for your outlook on life. And sure, if you've never been there that may seem like it should go without saying. But trust me when I say that when you're in constant pain, bitterness and sarcasm can start to seem like a very valid lifestyle choice.

For when you're dealing with the people who completely understand your pain because they once got a paper cut:

And for when you're dealing with those people who insist that there's obviously nothing wrong with you:

So there you are. Appreciate the humor. Snark now and then if you have to. Just try not to let it control you.

Reclaiming Power Over My Pain

Despite how much it hurt getting out of bed this morning, and how difficult it was to walk all day, and the vice-like headache that's been squeezing my temples since early this afternoon... it's actually been a really good day.

For some time now (weeks, at least - maybe months?) I've been thinking about how I want to reevaluate my approach to pain control (and health in general.) But, for a number of reasons, I've been dragging my feet. I had some passing thoughts, and had begun a little research on a few fronts, but never really got my head in the game in any serious way.

But over the past couple of weeks, motivated in large part by the events of Pain Awareness Month and Invisible Illness Week, I've been starting to focus a little better. And I've come to realize that I've been somewhat less than proactive about my pain management for far too long.

I got into that routine that sometimes comes with a chronic illness. Your doctor visits become so mind-numbingly routine that you start to do whatever the doctor tells you without even really questioning it. Take this medication? Sure. Have these tests done? Okay. You want to try injecting something else into a different part of my body this time? Sounds great. It just goes on and on.

Then this morning I got the final push that I needed, and came to a firm, no-more-denying-it decision that I am going to take back the control over my health. I was mentally preparing for this afternoon's visit to my pain doctor, and thinking about the two main things that I had to report. 1) The latest set of injections that we tried (because "they might help") were, in fact, no help at all. Several hours and $80 worth of nothing. And 2) The pain killers that I'm on have started giving me headaches, and that needs to stop.

And then I had the epiphany. Why am I spending so much time and money for other people to do things that aren't working? Shouldn't I really start focusing my energy in a new direction?

This will be a process, of course. But I'm hoping that I can learn some new things that will actually change how I live with my illnesses, instead of just going through the motions like I've been doing for so long. It's not that I'm completely walking away from medical care or anything. I just really need to take a more holistic approach, and I need to be in charge.

Sometimes making the decision to change is the hardest part. And sometimes, once you make that decision, you just know that you're finally on the right track. This is definitely one of those times. And it feels great.

LML Monday - People Who Understand

It's Monday once again, my friends. And as always that means it's time to reflect on the things that made us happy over the past week. And of course now is also the perfect time to set the tone for a great week to come! If you missed my take on LML, you can find it here. If you missed the explanation of LML Monday, you can catch up here. 

Not only is September National Pain Awareness Month, but this week (September 10-16) is also Invisible Illness Week. As someone who suffers from several invisible illnesses, all of which cause a great deal of pain, I have to appreciate both of these events.

There are several obvious reasons why these awareness events are a great thing. But the best part for me - the thing that I love the most - is that it gives us a chance to come together with other people who understand what we are going through.

Chronic pain, or any other chronic illness for that matter, can be a very isolating thing. Our illness keeps us from being able to do the things we used to enjoy. It makes people uncomfortable, because they don't really know how to relate to us any more. And trying to act "normal" all the time just to avoid having to explain things to people is extremely exhausting.

But every now and then something comes along to remind us that we are not alone, and that there actually are people who have been there too. That's a very comforting thing to have. And in this wonderful age of technology we are even better able to connect with others all over the world and learn just how much we share. And that, to me, is amazing.

Don't get me wrong. This isn't a "members only" thing, where your opinion doesn't matter just because you aren't living with an illness. I am lucky enough to have many wonderful people in my life who are incredibly understanding and supportive, even if they don't know exactly what it's like to be living with the issues that I have. And I'm eternally grateful for that support system.

But even with that, it is still nice - and very necessary - to be able to share with people who have lived it. And that's why I love Invisible Illness Week, and why I'm happy to support it. If you or anyone you love suffers from an invisible illness, I encourage you to visit their web site and take advantage of all of the information and support available.


Ok. I shared mine - now it's your turn! Please feel free to share some of your recent LML moments, or some of the things that you're looking forward to in the coming week. Focus on the happy thoughts, and let's all have a great week!

And if you're a blogger and would like to get in on the LML fun, feel free to grab the code and join the blog hop! (And please be sure to link back here.) Your post doesn't specifically have to use the "LML" label (although you're welcome to use it if you'd like.) But if you have any kind of happy, positive Monday message that you'd like to share you're welcome to join. The more happy vibes, the better the Monday!

It's National Pain Awareness Month

As I mentioned last year, September is National Pain Awareness Month. There are many pain related web sites out there, and they all have their own ways of saying it, but basically the purpose of this month is to increase public awareness of the issues that pain sufferers face and to help advocate for new/better/effective treatments for those in pain. If you're interested in the history of this month, you can find it here on the American Chronic Pain Association's web site.

I've talked from time to time about some of the issues that my chronic pain has caused. (But I haven't even come close to covering all of them. They are varied, and they are many.) I always try not to spend too much energy focusing on the negative issues, but sometimes things do need to be shared - particularly when it could help someone else out there that might be suffering in similar ways.

So I decided that my efforts this month will focus on not just the issues that we face, but also on some of the many resources out there that can help us deal with them. And, because the more information we share the better it is for all of us, I ask you to please share any of your own helpful resources that you have found when dealing with these or similar issues.

Today's issue: stress and the need for relaxation. This is a big one for people in pain. Not only does pain cause stress, but stress also increases pain. So it is very easy to get into a vicious pain/stress cycle that just keeps feeding on itself and dragging you down.

Because of this cycle, chronic pain sufferers are always on the lookout for ways to relax and release tension. One of my favorite techniques over the years has been guided meditation. It helps me focus my energy, and I almost always come away feeling less stress and (at least a little) less pain.

If you want to give it a try, the good people at the American Chronic Pain Association offer a five and a half minute Relaxation Guide that you can find here. It's quick, and easy, and you can do it right now while you're sitting at your computer.  (And if you love it, you can also find the longer audio version in their store.)

Of course there are many other guided meditation videos and CDs out there. Some you might like, and some you won't. (It's all a personal preference thing. We all have different tastes and styles.) I highly recommend finding a seller that lets you listen before you buy, to make sure it's something that speaks to you.

Do you have a favorite guided meditation resource? Do you have a different way that you deal with stress? Please share!

Pain Awareness Month

I woke up yesterday morning in terrible pain. More than I've felt at the same time in.... well, a while. It seemed like every little thing that I have wrong with me - literally from head to toe - had decided to make itself known in unison. It was wicked. And I could go into great detail about every little bit of it, but you get the idea.

Later I discovered that September is Pain Awareness Month. (Yeah... I was already fully aware of it, thanks.) Somehow I don't think that's exactly what they had in mind with the campaign. But appreciating irony like I do, I couldn't help but be at least a little bit amused.

So I think I'll be sharing a few pain-related things with you this month. I can't see myself focusing just on pain the entire month, because frankly it gets a little depressing if you focus on it for too long. But there are a lot of positive things out there, and of course (you know me) those are the things that we'll be discussing here.

To start us off, I have to share the current campaign from the American Pain Foundation. You can read all about it on their web site, and join their "If I lived in a world with less pain" event on Facebook.


As they so beautifully say:

Imagine a world where people with pain are believed. Imagine a world where people with pain are heard and shown respect and dignity. Imagine a world where pain is as important to manage or treat as any other disease. Imagine a World With Less Pain.

According to the APF, in the United States alone there are more than 116 million people living with pain. With that in mind, I'd say chances are pretty good that you might know at least a few of them. So now is the time to show your support, and help spread awareness. And hopefully one day soon we won't have to imagine that world, because it will be a reality.