LML Monday - Harkins PlayCenters and Sibling Slumber Parties

It's Monday once again, my friends. And as always that means it's time to reflect on the things that made us happy over the past week. And of course now is also the perfect time to set the tone for a great week to come! If you missed my take on LML, you can find it here. If you missed the explanation of LML Monday, you can catch up here.  

As I mentioned the other day, I was having kind of a rough week last week. And at times like that, it can be really tempting to blow off the LML idea, and throw yourself a "nothing good happened this week" pity party. So I whined a little, and I put off coming near my computer.

But then I finally had a friendly little conversation with myself, resulting in the realization that these are the times when focusing on the good things is the most important. No matter how much we want to ignore or deny it, there is always something good to be found. And forcing myself to write these posts is always a great way to remind myself of that. (Even the best of us need those little reminders now and then.)

So here we go.

Harkins PlayCenters
Yesterday, after our traditional Sunday brunch as a family, my husband and I decided that it would be nice to have a little date of our own. We had been looking forward to seeing the latest installment of the Resident Evil franchise. (It's one of those things that he and I share - if it has to do with zombies, we're pretty much going to watch it.)

And thanks to the good people at Harkins Theaters, and their in-lobby children's PlayCenter, we all got to have a really fun afternoon. This is the second time we've taken the kids there, and they always have a blast. They can watch DVDs, or play with any number of video and computer games, toys, books, and arts & crafts. They're safe, supervised, and having fun, and mom and dad get to relax and enjoy ourselves.

Sure, the movie may not have been the best one in the series. (And really, after this many of them they're bound to start going down hill a little, so I can't really hold that against them.) All things considered, though, it was still entertaining. And they brought back several of the characters from previous movies, which is always nice to see.

But whether or not it was an Oscar-worthy movie really wasn't the point, anyway. I got to spend a little time with my husband, which thanks to his work schedule is kind of a rare treat these days. The movie could have been completely terrible, and I still would have been happy.

Sibling Slumber Parties
When we moved into our house, the kids decided that they wanted to share a bedroom. (They pretty much spend all of their time together anyway, so sharing a room just made things easier.) I'm sure when they get older they'll want their own rooms, but at this age they love sharing the space.

On Friday, they told me that they wanted to have a slumber party. I didn't get it at first, since they sleep in the same room every night, but then they showed me what they had in mind. My son had moved all of his stuff over to one side, and made room to squeeze all of his sister's blankets and pillows in with him. They climbed in, snuggled up together, and said "See? There's room for both of us! Please, can we have a slumber party?! Please-please-please-please-please?!" It was so adorable, there was just no way to refuse.

To my surprise, there was no fighting over covers, or complaining about lack of space. They just slept happily together the entire night. It was one of the sweetest things I've seen in a long time.


Ok. I shared mine - now it's your turn! Please feel free to leave me a comment and share some of your recent LML moments. Focus on the happy thoughts, and let's all have a great week!

And if you're a blogger and would like to get in on the LML fun, feel free to grab the code and join the blog hop! (And please be sure to link back here!) Your post doesn't specifically have to use the "LML" label (although you're welcome to use it if you'd like.) But if you have any kind of happy, positive Monday message that you'd like to share you're welcome to join. The more happy vibes, the better the Monday! 

Just Keep Swimming

I took the kids to see Finding Nemo yesterday. Yes, we own it on DVD, and we've seen it many times. But of course we had to go see it in the theater, because now it's in 3D. I didn't really mind, though, because it's a cute movie, and seeing it on the big screen was kind of cool.

While the whole movie is fun, and all of the characters have their merits, Dory has always been my favorite. Sure, she has issues. But she is incredibly sweet, and caring, and always means well. And I love her attitude. She never lets her problems get her down, and her glass is always half full.

I've always kind of related to Dory in a way. I don't exactly suffer from short-term memory loss like she does, but thanks to the issues associated with the CRPS, coupled with the years of pain medications, I do have trouble with my short-term memory sometimes. So every time I suddenly forget what I was doing, I think of her.

And sometimes, I like to sing her song.

I've been a bit of a "Mr. Grumpy Gills" the last few days. I've been trying to fight it, but even those of us who do our best to always look on the bright side can have our cloudy moments too. Unfortunately it comes with the territory of living with a chronic illness. 

We all have our ups and downs - I know I'm not alone in that. Sometimes it's easy to believe that we can get through it, and that things will get better... and then there are times when just getting drunk and having a big bowl of ice cream for dinner sounds like a really brilliant idea. (Not that I've ever actually done that. But I can't lie - there have been moments lately when it did briefly cross my mind.)

But the "downs" do eventually pass, and the "ups" come back. So we can never let ourselves forget that all we have to do is just keep swimming.

When it All Fits Together

Do you ever have those times in your life when everything just seems to be fitting together perfectly, and all signs keep pointing you in the same direction? I love those times!

Over the weekend, just days after I talked to my doctor about my new approach to pain management, that very office happened to be holding a Chronic Pain Awareness Expo. It promised to "highlight a variety of chronic pain topics & community resources" and "provide attendees with helpful information to successfully manage their pain." Just the kind of things I was looking for!

So I managed to line up some last-minute babysitting (thanks again Mom!) and headed over to check it out. Events like this can be kind of hit or miss, so I wasn't sure if it would be worthwhile or not. But luckily, this was one of those times when it actually was.

The one disappointing thing was that I showed up about three hours before the event was scheduled to end, and more than half of the vendors had already left. Even with that, the ones that had stuck around had some great information to offer. I met some great people, got a few product samples, and left with several new things to research and think about.

Feeling bad that so many of the vendors had left early, one of the organizers mentioned that the clinic is having another expo at their main location at the end of the month, and she said it promises to be even bigger and better. It's quite a few miles farther to drive, but I think it might be worth it.

I'll share more about some of the things I got from this weekend's fair as I have more time to finish reading and doing the research. (I think there's some pretty interesting stuff to be learned, so stay tuned!) Also, if you happen to be in the Scottsdale (AZ) area on the 29th, consider checking out the expo! Or, if you're not in the area, I encourage you to do some checking and see if there are any events like this in your area. You never know what great stuff you could find!

LML Monday - Nice Views, Hide & Seek, and Sunday Brunch

It's Monday once again, my friends. And as always that means it's time to reflect on the things that made us happy over the past week. And of course now is also the perfect time to set the tone for a great week to come! If you missed my take on LML, you can find it here. If you missed the explanation of LML Monday, you can catch up here. 

Nice Views
When I was younger, one of the things that I always wanted in my house was a window over the kitchen sink. (I wanted to be able to look up and see a nice view when I was washing dishes.) I don't know why, but it was just one of those little things that seemed really important.

Over the years I had a couple of apartments with kitchen windows... but all I got each time was a view of the next building. Better than staring at a wall while washing dishes, but not by much. So I was delighted when my husband and I bought our house, and I finally got a decent view from the kitchen sink.

Sure, it's just a back yard. But I have trees that the birds love to visit, and certain times of year the little tree is covered with these really beautiful yellow flowers. It's a little thing, but it does make washing dishes considerably more pleasant, and the view always manages to make me smile.

Hide & Seek
When you live with chronic pain, the world is full of things that you can't do. So eventually you learn to really appreciate any little thing that you can do - particularly when it comes to playing with your kids. I can't run around and play tag. I can't tumble around on the floor, or give them piggy-back rides. But we still find some great ways to have plenty of fun together.

One of their favorite games is hide-and-seek, particularly when I hide. At first I would make it easy for them, "hiding" where they could quickly find me with little effort. But I eventually discovered that the better I hid - and the harder they had to search for me - the more fun they had. And then I learned that the best times are when I jump out and scare them instead of letting them find me. Their jumps and squeals are followed by some of the best laughter I've ever heard.

Sunday Brunch
Between school and work schedules, plus all of the extra curricular activities that come with having kids, there are, unfortunately, not a lot of times when my entire family is actually in the same room together.  I'm sure many of you can relate to this, as I'm sure know how much you have to appreciate whatever little time you do have together.

For us, we decided to make it a point to always have Sunday brunch together. It's the one morning each week that we can all spare the time, and don't have to commit to anything else but each other. Sometimes we go out, and sometimes we make a nice big brunch at home. Sometimes we only have a couple of hours (because Daddy still has to go to work in the afternoon.) But sometimes we can make a day of it, and follow brunch with a trip to the playground, or a movie, or anything else that we can enjoy as a family. It's a fabulous way to end the week!


Ok. I shared mine - now it's your turn! Please feel free to leave me a comment and share some of your recent LML moments. Focus on the happy thoughts, and let's all have a great week!

And if you're a blogger and would like to get in on the LML fun, feel free to grab the code and join the blog hop! (And please be sure to link back here!) Your post doesn't specifically have to use the "LML" label (although you're welcome to use it if you'd like.) But if you have any kind of happy, positive Monday message that you'd like to share you're welcome to join. The more happy vibes, the better the Monday!

Resisting the Urge to Be Snarky

I wrote the other day about how important it is, when you have a chronic illness, to find people who understand what you're going through. Because, unfortunately, there are a lot of people who completely don't understand. And as I've mentioned, some of those people who don't understand can get pretty nasty about it.

Having a chronic illness is enough of a roller coaster ride in itself. Adding all of the extra emotional turmoil just gives you that much more to deal with. And I'm not going to lie - it gets tough sometimes. We all go through the different stages of how to deal with the more difficult people and situations that we encounter. And like it or not, sometimes we can't help but be a little snarky and sarcastic.

I came across a couple of pictures going around on Facebook this week. And I'm going to share them, because they made me laugh, but I have to share them with a caveat. The first thing is that people in constant pain have to be able to laugh, and sometimes the irony of what we deal with is as good of an excuse as any. So when you see things like this, appreciate them for what they are, and laugh.

But at the same time, remember that the sarcasm serves a purpose, but should not be used as a guide for your outlook on life. And sure, if you've never been there that may seem like it should go without saying. But trust me when I say that when you're in constant pain, bitterness and sarcasm can start to seem like a very valid lifestyle choice.

For when you're dealing with the people who completely understand your pain because they once got a paper cut:

And for when you're dealing with those people who insist that there's obviously nothing wrong with you:

So there you are. Appreciate the humor. Snark now and then if you have to. Just try not to let it control you.

Reclaiming Power Over My Pain

Despite how much it hurt getting out of bed this morning, and how difficult it was to walk all day, and the vice-like headache that's been squeezing my temples since early this afternoon... it's actually been a really good day.

For some time now (weeks, at least - maybe months?) I've been thinking about how I want to reevaluate my approach to pain control (and health in general.) But, for a number of reasons, I've been dragging my feet. I had some passing thoughts, and had begun a little research on a few fronts, but never really got my head in the game in any serious way.

But over the past couple of weeks, motivated in large part by the events of Pain Awareness Month and Invisible Illness Week, I've been starting to focus a little better. And I've come to realize that I've been somewhat less than proactive about my pain management for far too long.

I got into that routine that sometimes comes with a chronic illness. Your doctor visits become so mind-numbingly routine that you start to do whatever the doctor tells you without even really questioning it. Take this medication? Sure. Have these tests done? Okay. You want to try injecting something else into a different part of my body this time? Sounds great. It just goes on and on.

Then this morning I got the final push that I needed, and came to a firm, no-more-denying-it decision that I am going to take back the control over my health. I was mentally preparing for this afternoon's visit to my pain doctor, and thinking about the two main things that I had to report. 1) The latest set of injections that we tried (because "they might help") were, in fact, no help at all. Several hours and $80 worth of nothing. And 2) The pain killers that I'm on have started giving me headaches, and that needs to stop.

And then I had the epiphany. Why am I spending so much time and money for other people to do things that aren't working? Shouldn't I really start focusing my energy in a new direction?

This will be a process, of course. But I'm hoping that I can learn some new things that will actually change how I live with my illnesses, instead of just going through the motions like I've been doing for so long. It's not that I'm completely walking away from medical care or anything. I just really need to take a more holistic approach, and I need to be in charge.

Sometimes making the decision to change is the hardest part. And sometimes, once you make that decision, you just know that you're finally on the right track. This is definitely one of those times. And it feels great.

I is for the times "I should be writing."

In the spirit of multitasking, today we'll combine an ABC Wednesday post with an Invisible Illness Week post.

The timing of this one worked out perfectly, because I've been thinking a lot in the past few weeks about how little I've been blogging - just one or two posts a week, typically. And it wasn't because I've been being lazy, and it wasn't because I didn't have anything to say. It was strictly because I've been dealing with a lot of pain lately, and that has made everything very difficult.

One of the great things about blogging (and one of the reason that a lot of people with chronic illnesses do it) is that we can blog pretty much any time, from pretty much anywhere. So it's usually fairly easy to work around our pain, and write during those times when we're feeling (relatively) better. But unfortunately for many of us, those times when we feel "better" sometimes don't come around for a while, and there can be days or weeks or more when we can barely manage getting out of bed, let alone anything else.

But even though there is a legitimate reason for the inactivity, that doesn't make it any easier. Not being able to do the things we want to do is one of the most frustrating things about having a chronic illness. The mind is willing - it wants to get up and go. But the body simply isn't able.

There are a truckload of emotions that go along with this. It is very easy to get angry, or depressed. You can place blame. You can be resentful. You can berate yourself for all of the things that you "should be" doing with your time. (That one comes up a lot for me.) I catch myself starting to feel guilty when the pain is keeping me from something. Several times in recent weeks I would grumble that "I should be writing" as I took pain killers and crawled into bed instead.

Often, it seems, one of the hardest things for those of us with chronic illnesses to embrace is the idea of forgiveness. Even with the 20 years that I've had to work on it, I still have a hard time forgiving myself for not being able to do the things that I want to do, or stopping myself from using the phrase "should be" when describing something that I'd like to be doing.

I'm not going to shrivel up and die if I don't post every day. The blogger police are not going to knock down my door. What I "should be" doing on the bad pain days is taking care of myself and weathering the storm as best I can. Because they will eventually pass, and beating myself up over them doesn't accomplish anything.

I wanted to share this, because I have a feeling that I'm not alone. Whether you're a fellow chronic illness sufferer or not, have you ever noticed that you sometimes get down on yourself for things that you "should be" doing, even when circumstances are out of your control? I think we probably all have those moments when we just need to step back, relax, and give ourselves a little break.

LML Monday - People Who Understand

It's Monday once again, my friends. And as always that means it's time to reflect on the things that made us happy over the past week. And of course now is also the perfect time to set the tone for a great week to come! If you missed my take on LML, you can find it here. If you missed the explanation of LML Monday, you can catch up here. 

Not only is September National Pain Awareness Month, but this week (September 10-16) is also Invisible Illness Week. As someone who suffers from several invisible illnesses, all of which cause a great deal of pain, I have to appreciate both of these events.

There are several obvious reasons why these awareness events are a great thing. But the best part for me - the thing that I love the most - is that it gives us a chance to come together with other people who understand what we are going through.

Chronic pain, or any other chronic illness for that matter, can be a very isolating thing. Our illness keeps us from being able to do the things we used to enjoy. It makes people uncomfortable, because they don't really know how to relate to us any more. And trying to act "normal" all the time just to avoid having to explain things to people is extremely exhausting.

But every now and then something comes along to remind us that we are not alone, and that there actually are people who have been there too. That's a very comforting thing to have. And in this wonderful age of technology we are even better able to connect with others all over the world and learn just how much we share. And that, to me, is amazing.

Don't get me wrong. This isn't a "members only" thing, where your opinion doesn't matter just because you aren't living with an illness. I am lucky enough to have many wonderful people in my life who are incredibly understanding and supportive, even if they don't know exactly what it's like to be living with the issues that I have. And I'm eternally grateful for that support system.

But even with that, it is still nice - and very necessary - to be able to share with people who have lived it. And that's why I love Invisible Illness Week, and why I'm happy to support it. If you or anyone you love suffers from an invisible illness, I encourage you to visit their web site and take advantage of all of the information and support available.


Ok. I shared mine - now it's your turn! Please feel free to share some of your recent LML moments, or some of the things that you're looking forward to in the coming week. Focus on the happy thoughts, and let's all have a great week!

And if you're a blogger and would like to get in on the LML fun, feel free to grab the code and join the blog hop! (And please be sure to link back here.) Your post doesn't specifically have to use the "LML" label (although you're welcome to use it if you'd like.) But if you have any kind of happy, positive Monday message that you'd like to share you're welcome to join. The more happy vibes, the better the Monday!

LML Monday - Laundry Helpers, School Lunch & Late-Night Doctors

It's Monday once again, my friends. And as always that means it's time to reflect on the things that made us happy over the past week. And of course now is also the perfect time to set the tone for a great week to come! If you missed my take on LML, you can find it here. If you missed the explanation of LML Monday, you can catch up here. 

Laundry Helpers
One afternoon as I was folding the kids' laundry my daughter came in and asked if she could help. I fought the urge to sigh, knowing (as most parents do) that quite often the "help" just ends up making more work for me. But I smiled and thanked her as she excitedly handed me each article of clothing from the basket.

As soon as the rest of the clothes were put away, I sat down to fold the piles of socks and underwear that we had separated. Of course she sat right down with me, and decided that it was her job to fold her own underwear. Again I fought the urge to stop her, thinking that I was just going to have to refold it when she was done. But then I sat and watched her.

With her face set in serious concentration, she worked her little hands so carefully and methodically, doing her absolute best to fold each piece as I had shown her. And as she added each completed pair to her stack, I realized that it didn't matter in the slightest if her folds weren't exact, or if her stacks weren't perfect. Because, frankly, who cares if a four-year-old's underwear drawer isn't perfect?

It turned out to be a good lesson in patience for me, a good lesson in responsibility for her, and it actually did make less work for me in the end. Overall, it ended up being a definite win.

School Lunch
On Friday my daughter and I volunteered to help out with an event that was going on at my son's school. And since we were going to be there anyway, we decided to stay and have lunch together. It turned out to be a nice treat for all of us. My daughter got to eat in the school cafeteria like a big kid, and my son was obviously thrilled to have us there. And I just got to sit back and soak in the joy.

Late-Night Doctors
For some reason, my son has quite a knack for getting sick right at the start of a holiday weekend. The Friday night before Memorial Day he came down, quite suddenly, with a stomach flu. And this past week, right at the start of Labor Day weekend, he managed to get sick again. It's bad enough to get sick on a normal weekend, but a holiday weekend is even worse (partly because it ruins a perfectly good three day weekend, and partially because your doctor's office is going to be closed until Tuesday.)

He was fine all day Friday, but late in the evening he started complaining that "I don't really feel very good." By Saturday morning he had the telltale wheezing that said we were going to be in for several rounds of nebulizer treatments. Sometimes that's all it takes, but unfortunately not this time. Around 10pm Saturday night he woke up in obvious pain, holding his chest and screaming that he couldn't breathe. (In case you're wondering - yes, that's a very scary thing for a mom to hear from her six-year-old.)

It was clear at that point that he was going to need more than just the breathing treatments we had been giving him, and that we weren't going to be able to wait until Tuesday to see a doctor. Fortunately for us there is an overnight pediatric care facility not too far away. (It's almost an hour drive, but I guess "not too far" is relative. It beats the heck out of waiting three more days to see someone.)

And so, praise all things that are good in the universe, we were able to get him some help. After they administered some steroids and a few more breathing treatments, his frighteningly low oxygen level finally came back up to near-normal, and we were able to avoid an even scarier (and way more expensive and frustrating) trip to the ER. He still isn't back to full health yet, but he is obviously on his way to getting better. And for that, I am eternally thankful.


I shared mine - now it's your turn! Please feel free to share some of your recent LML moments. Focus on the happy thoughts, and let's all have a great week!

And if you're a blogger and would like to get in on the LML fun, feel free to grab the code and join the blog hop! Your post doesn't specifically have to use the "LML" label (although you're welcome to use it if you'd like.) But if you have any kind of happy, positive Monday message that you'd like to share you're welcome to join. The more happy vibes, the better the Monday!

It's National Pain Awareness Month

As I mentioned last year, September is National Pain Awareness Month. There are many pain related web sites out there, and they all have their own ways of saying it, but basically the purpose of this month is to increase public awareness of the issues that pain sufferers face and to help advocate for new/better/effective treatments for those in pain. If you're interested in the history of this month, you can find it here on the American Chronic Pain Association's web site.

I've talked from time to time about some of the issues that my chronic pain has caused. (But I haven't even come close to covering all of them. They are varied, and they are many.) I always try not to spend too much energy focusing on the negative issues, but sometimes things do need to be shared - particularly when it could help someone else out there that might be suffering in similar ways.

So I decided that my efforts this month will focus on not just the issues that we face, but also on some of the many resources out there that can help us deal with them. And, because the more information we share the better it is for all of us, I ask you to please share any of your own helpful resources that you have found when dealing with these or similar issues.

Today's issue: stress and the need for relaxation. This is a big one for people in pain. Not only does pain cause stress, but stress also increases pain. So it is very easy to get into a vicious pain/stress cycle that just keeps feeding on itself and dragging you down.

Because of this cycle, chronic pain sufferers are always on the lookout for ways to relax and release tension. One of my favorite techniques over the years has been guided meditation. It helps me focus my energy, and I almost always come away feeling less stress and (at least a little) less pain.

If you want to give it a try, the good people at the American Chronic Pain Association offer a five and a half minute Relaxation Guide that you can find here. It's quick, and easy, and you can do it right now while you're sitting at your computer.  (And if you love it, you can also find the longer audio version in their store.)

Of course there are many other guided meditation videos and CDs out there. Some you might like, and some you won't. (It's all a personal preference thing. We all have different tastes and styles.) I highly recommend finding a seller that lets you listen before you buy, to make sure it's something that speaks to you.

Do you have a favorite guided meditation resource? Do you have a different way that you deal with stress? Please share!